Prince George Act II: Teapot Mountain

✍️ 🕑 • Series: Towards the Beautiful Islands • Tags: mountainsforeststrainsPrince Georgesquirrels • Places: Teapot Mountain Recreation Site

Last time, STEVE visited a city park and met some MISSIONARIES.

This time, STEVE climbs up the worst kind of moderate, minor mountain. A taunting, teapot mountain.

Our story begins thusly:



INT - STEVE is doing work at the dining table inside of an Airbnb. STEVE glances at the weather forecast.

WEATHER FORECAST
Today it’s partly cloudy with some sprinkles. Tomorrow it’s going to actually be much rainier around these parts. Which day are you going to go for a hike?


STEVE
(to work chat)
Gonna go for a hike, be back on later.


WEATHER FORECAST
Oh, look at that. Someone believes me! Someone.

The Crooked River just near the Teapot Mountain Trailhead...
The Crooked River just near the Teapot Mountain Trailhead... open_in_full   info

The teapot mountain trail is a short loop. On paper, it’s deceptively easy, a 1.5 mile loop up a small mountain.

In reality, the walk up is full of rocks, enough to rival or better the home of Pennsylvania. Couple that with a steep grade, and plenty of erosion, and the beginning of the trail is truly a little punishing.

Trail Information
Name Teapot Mountain Trail
Miles 1.5
Type loop
Location Teapot Mountain Recreation Site
State BC
Country Canada
Check out the trails index for information on more trails!

CUT TO - STEVE advancing up a steep slope.


STEVE
I’m glad this is a short trail, because this is pretty annoying.


STEVE utilizes trekking poles.



Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

A GROUP OF PEOPLE come by, on their way down from the mountain. One of them is not wearing proper footwear.


STEVE
Hi


GROUP LEADER
Hey. Keep going! It’s so worth the view.


PERSON WITHOUT PROPER FOOTWEAR slips and skids down part of the hill.



PERSON WITHOUT PROPER FOOTWEAR
Keep goin! It’s so worth it.


GROUP LEADER
Only thing that would be better would be if it were sunnier!


STEVE
Got it! Will do.



Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

STEVE continues uphill. It feels like an eternity has passed.


DISTANCE MARKER
1/4 KM


STEVE
This feels insulting.


STEVE continues further uphill. It feels like another eternity has passed.

DISTANCE MARKER
1/2 KM


STEVE
Hang on. I’ve been doing all of this work, and I’ve only moved 500 meters?




As STEVE continues to ascend, it becomes clear that teapot mountain is special. A beautiful view is hiding between the trees, becoming more and more visible with each step upwards.


Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

The trail splits in two. STEVE steps to the right, to save the most expansive vistas for last.




Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

Teapot Mountain Summit View
 
Click to load YouTube video.


I hope, dear readers, that you never doubted that this mountain would have a teapot.
I hope, dear readers, that you never doubted that this mountain would have a teapot. open_in_full   info

Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

LOL It's "Teapot Mountain," not "Teapot Hill" -- GET A LIFE, STEVE!!!
 
Click to load YouTube video.


Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

Not sure why there's a cross here, but there is.
Not sure why there's a cross here, but there is. open_in_full   info
I'm a BORN Wildlife Videographer (or, Squirrel & Nut)
 
Click to load YouTube video.

Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info


STEVE no longer feels tired, no longer feels pain, and only feels bliss and ecstacy.

STEVE spent forever on this trail, not because of the punishing climb, but because they were savoring the vistas, and the solitude.



CUT TO - VEHICLE INT

STEVE is driving. Rumbling stomach noises dominate the soundtrack.

STEVE looks in the horizon and sees a bar and restaurant.


CUT TO - INT

STEVE walks into a bar, looking like a city slicker walking into a rural bar in one of them movies. But like, also tired and hungry and probably with a bit of post-hike grime.

The bar is packed with PARTYGOERS who are having numerous conversations, elated to see one another.

A DOORMAN greets STEVE.



DOORMAN
Hi, welcome. Our tables are closed for a private event.


STEVE
Oh, okay. I guess I’ll go elsewhere.


DOORMAN
The seating at the bar is open.


STEVE
I can find somewhere else to go.


DOORMAN
It’s up to you. It’s really not a problem.


STEVE listens to their heart. Then, their stomach, and walks up to the bar.


Two minutes later, the bar erupts with various cries. When the PARTYGOERS are happy, this PATRON is unhappy.

There is a hockey match on TV. It appears the PATRON and the PARTYGOERS support opposite teams.

A BARTENDER walks over.


BARTENDER
What will you have?

STEVE
What kinds of beer have you got?


In this moment, STEVE realizes that this bar does not have craft beer, and STEVE cannot remember the last time an IPA or the like hasn’t been on the menu.

Talk about a city slicker!

STEVE
I’ll have a Rickard’s Red.

BARTENDER
With lime?

STEVE
Of course.
Can I get a food menu?


STEVE orders a Reuben, which comes with fries.

As the food is being prepared, the BARTENDER and a SECOND BARTENDER occasionally pass by.


BARTENDER
Do you want some gravy to go with your fries?

STEVE
That would be lovely, thanks.

SECOND BARTENDER
Do you want vinegar, like for your fries?

STEVE
Yeah, that sounds really good.

BARTENDER
Would you like some ketchup with your fries?

STEVE
Sure!

Just as STEVE is starting to feel that he must seem really cute or something, the BARTENDERS disappear.

Several minutes later, a SANDWICH and FRENCH FRIES appear, accompanied by GRAVY, VINEGAR, and KETCHUP.


BARTENDER
Everything good?


STEVE
Yep!


STEVE
(to self)
Why do I have so many condiments?




Thus filled up, STEVE returns fully to the city of Prince George, stopping for gas. The cost is roughly $6/gallon.


Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

In the distance, the sun is setting a brilliant red. STEVE doesn’t realize how brilliant the scene is until it is too late for a good photograph. The uphill drive has begun.


After STEVE parks by the Airbnb, the sunset is obscured by trees. Maybe, though, STEVE and the camera can get a good glimpse?

STEVE rushes to the end of the street, the top of the bluff, with a heart full of hope.

Looking down, there are piles of scrapped cars and industrial buildings in the distance. And a glimmer of sunset.


Image On Where-Is-Steve
open_in_full   info

A different stunning view after a day chock full of them.

Thanks for reading!

If you enjoyed this post, you might enjoy these 5 similar posts: